My City Woman's blog on being-an-imperfect-parent

Being An “Imperfect” Parent

This blog is not about preaching how to be a perfect parent. It is about learning to adapt our parenting style to our child’s needs and giving them a childhood they can truly cherish when they grow up.

A child gives birth to a parent. While every parent tries to give their best to their children, we know we are not perfect. For  not only is every child different, the parenting too varies from one another. Every day we see and hear, especially through the much read social media, on how to be the best parent. To me it’s a farce. It is a moving target – the kids grow up real fast. Their needs change every day. They learn new things. We as parents can just be a “veiled support” – something like being there but still giving them the much needed space to think, act and learn from their lives – on their own.

True parenting is not about being perfect; for no parent is or can be perfect. Just like no child is perfect. Asking for perfection is amateurish to say the least.   We learn new things, disciplines and “strategies” along with our kids. The more a parent learns to adapt their style to their kids, the less friction there would be with the child.

We as adults have a zillion things seeking our attention. In whatever we do and however we lead our lives, the least we can do is pass on our stress and its effects to kids at home. It is too early for the young minds to understand  the tussle of an adult life.

Kids of all ages need space, assurance, trust and respect. In fact, it is their basic right and vital to their growth and wholesome development.

Space –

When you see your kid engrossed in something, let them be. Allow them to explore, see and form their own opinion of things around them.

Assurance  –

While we are always watching them, allow your kids to fight their own battles. It would make them independent, mentally strong and confident of themselves. We can always be standing at the end, supporting them, cheering them and allowing them to be themselves. This assurance with give them the will to fight and the zest to chase on!

Trust –

Trust that they will always come back to you, no matter what they have done- good or bad. Trust their instincts and ability.

Respect –

Talk to them one on one. Talk like they are equals. Understand that not getting their best friend to sit next to them is “not acceptable” to him. If it matters to them, it cannot be trivial.

 

So long we try and fulfil these tenets, I am guessing we are doing our job well as a parent. Rest we can learn along the way, I am hoping!

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